No matter how much you don’t want to, if you have children with your ex, you will have to interact with them after the divorce. Raising children together with an ex can be challenging but it can also be extremely rewarding and positive for everyone involved. Here are 8 tips on how to co-parent successfully with an ex. If you are seeking help with divorce, child custody, or mediation, the family law attorneys at Lasiter & Jackson in Phoenix can help you today.
Phoenix Divorce & Child Custody Lawyer Tips On Co-Parenting
Your child custody lawyer should be the first to tell you that your child custody agreement is made in the best interest of your children, not you or your ex. With that in mind, understand that any tip related to co-parenting with an ex is intended to provide the best outcome for your children, but can benefit the unit altogether.
Respect Your Ex’s Time – If you agree to drop-off/pick-up times, don’t be late. Respect that your ex made plans and arrangements to be at the drop-off/pick-up point. It’s common courtesy and hopefully, the respect with be mutual.
Remember That Your Kids Still Love Your Ex – And they may want to take about their time with your ex. Listen to your kids with the love of a parent who understands that while it may not feel good for you, eventually it won’t be painful, and your child will know that they can talk to you.
Don’t Forget Important Details & Events – Let your ex know about any dance recitals, sporting events, plays, and school-related events so that they have the option to attend. Show the same courtesy for doctor appointments, dentist appointments, and other appointments as necessary.
Ask Your Ex For Their Thoughts – If a situation arises with one of the children, let your ex know about it and ask them how they feel it should be handled. Letting down your guard and showing that you don’t need to control the situation can help your ex feel heard and involved.
Don’t Go Crazy With Communication – When your kids are with their ex – respect that time. Limit communication with your kids and wait to ask questions until they are home.
Take Time Out – You need time to recuperate, relax, and get used to a new life. It may be difficult to be away from your children for certain periods of time, but this is time for you to regroup and refresh – ultimately to be a better you!
Don’t Start The Fights – Keep your communication light with your ex. Don’t pick battles. As the saying goes “choose your battles.” Fighting with your ex about how much your kids play video games is probably not going to change what they do at your ex’s house. If serious issues arise and your ex refuses to cooperate, contact the child custody lawyers at Lasiter and Jackson in Phoenix to determine your next step and options.
Follow The Golden Rule – When you don’t know how to behave, follow the golden rule. You may have times where you feel impatient, angry, sad, scared, and frustrated. You may want to lash out and try to establish dominance and control but it isn’t going to help your situation any. Remain calm and follow the golden rule.
Lasiter & Jackson, located in Phoenix, Arizona (AZ), also represents clients in the East Valley and West Valley communities, in Scottsdale, Tempe, Mesa, Chandler, Avondale, Sun City, Gilbert, Surprise, Glendale and Peoria; counties served include Maricopa County and Pinal County.